At book club the other week, my friend Rachel introduced me to a new member of our group as “a fashionista.” I instantly bridled, and said, “No, I’m not. Please don’t call me that.” Poor Rachel, she looked startled at my vehemence. I was startled myself, actually.
So what’s wrong with being a fashionista? I can’t really say. I just know that the word bothers me. Maybe because, to me, it implies that I’m overly worried about fashion, and clothes, and what I wear. More worried about how I look than I should be, more worried than others are. Worried about shallow things, like what I wear, to the exclusion of other more serious or important matters.
I’m sure that’s not what my friend meant. I’m sure that she simply meant that I dress nicely. Still, the word resonates criticism to me. Silliness, frippery, air-headedness. If we can call air-headedness a word.
I know I shouldn’t be so sensitive. Besides, I do worry about how I look and what I wear. Clothes have always been a kind of armour for me. If I like what I’m wearing and feel that I look good, feelings of confidence will follow. And of course the opposite is true as well.
This stems, I think, from a tendency to be too self-critical, too ready to disparage myself. It’s a family trait. We all do it. My sisters and I have always struggled with self-confidence. Less now than when we were younger. If you ever saw photos of my sisters when they were younger, you’d be very surprised that they lacked self-confidence. They were beautiful.
My mum struggled with self-confidence too, although most people would never guess that. She was so funny and out-spoken that she hid it well. I remember my mum telling me that when she married my father, who was handsome and comfortable in social situations, she felt as if she could go anywhere with him and be confident. That he’d know how to act and how to be, and that gave her confidence.
And it’s ironic, I think, that over the years I have used clothes as a way to boost my confidence, and at the same time I have always felt a bit defensive about my love of clothes. Fearing that people will see someone who is not serious enough, or intelligent enough to NOT worry about how they dress. I admit, it’s a conundrum.
But you see, there’s more to my relationship with fashion and clothes than boosting my confidence. I also simply love clothes. And fashion. And the art of getting dressed.
But here’s the thing I feel strongly about: loving clothes is not the same as being a fashionista. At least not to me. To me, being a fashionista means being obsessed with being fashionable, keeping up with any and all trends, and shopping way too much to meet the goal of trendiness. Being a fashionista is performative, kind of showing off, in a way. It does not mean, at least to me, simply loving fashion and the art of fashion. It does not mean simply being in love with clothes.
So while I hold my hand up to loving fashion and clothes and planning outfits and loving how I feel when I really, really love what I’m wearing… I reject the label of fashionista.
Case in point. See these three photos above? They’ve been in my “inspiration folder” on my computer for a while. I love all three outfits. The colours, and combinations of colours, the textures, the styling choices, the minimal accessories.
Take the outfit on the right. I love those grey chunky socks with the chocolate brown, suede loafers. The dressy, tailored brown coat with dark denim, and the loose, grey-green sweater. How the whole look appears undone even though each piece was probably consciously chosen to create a polished and yet unpolished final product.
I love the brown tailored coat in the centre, with the soft grey, crew-neck sweater, and the black knee-high boots. Brown with grey seems to be a thing lately.
And in the photo on the left I love the mix of textures and fabrics and shades in the same tones. The slouchy bag and loose hoody, worn over that beautiful suede skirt and super casual puffer jacket. The proportions are all perfect. The message is luxe and louche, high-end brands and thrift-store chic all at once. Even though all the pieces are from Max Mara, and definitely not sold at thrift store prices.
And while I love all three outfits, and like to ponder why they work so well, I don’t want to rush out and buy new clothing to get those looks. They don’t influence me to shop. I love them for the art of the outfit, you might say. In fact one thing that appealed to me about all three looks was that I already own similar pieces. I have loafers, a long tailored coat, knee-high boots, and a couple of puffer jackets. I may play around in my closet at some point, using the above images as inspiration.
But yesterday, I wasn’t feeling like a closet rummage. Instead, I thought I’d take some photos of the three pieces I bought recently in Montreal. None of them are cutting-edge, trendy pieces.
Like the Max Mara cashmere sweater below. And the black, straight-leg Mother jeans. Both of these pieces are classic closet basics. They go with most everything in my wardrobe. I needed full-length, black, casual pants since my black Aritzia cargoes bit the dust. And I wanted a warm, shorter length, loose, winter sweater that would slip easily under my coats and jackets, and which was not a turtleneck.
The Jacquemus chocolate brown tote bag below was a splurge. I fell in love with the yummy texture of the leather, the chocolate brown colour, and the minimal style. But if it hadn’t been 60% off with an extra 20% off the sale price, I doubt I would have caved.
You know, it just dawned on me that maybe part of what bothers me about the term “fashionista,” and being labelled as such at 69, almost 70, years old is that the term seems to connote youth. And while I don’t consider myself old, I’m no spring chicken either. Similar to women my age calling themselves “girlies” on social media, using the term fashionista is kind of cringe-worthy.
Like being a fashionista, being a “fashion blogger” can also be somewhat cringe worthy. I’ve always felt a slight sense of embarrassment for having a blog that is, in part, about fashion. I mean, I’m not an expert. I’m not trained in fashion. I have no experience working in fashion. I just love fashion and clothes. I neither seek fashion advice, nor seek to offer fashion advice. I only want to have a conversation with women, like me, who love clothes. And who struggle to decide what to wear as we age. And, more recently, how we can manage our wardrobes and still be good consumers.
What’s interesting, at least to me, is that it took my reading the book The Thoughtful Dresser by Linda Grant to realize that there were intelligent, talented, amazing women out there who were respected for their intelligence and their talent and who were also a bit obsessive about clothes. What an epiphany that was.
And then I started this blog, and discovered lots of other talented, intelligent women who also loved clothes. But you’ve heard that story before.
You know, over the years, my defensiveness about my love of fashion and worrying about what I wear has waned. I still care about how I look and what I wear. I still love it when an outfit makes me feel like a million bucks. But I no longer think that caring about fashion has any bearing on how smart or competent I am. And if someone thinks that I am less than I am because I care about whether my pants are the right length, or my sweater should be oversized or cropped, then more fool them.
But… please, please do not call me a fashionista.
94 thoughts on “What’s Wrong with Being a Fashionista?”
Sue I don’t find the term ‘fashionista’ loaded at all. Maybe someone somewhere in your past made a rude comment that stung and it has sat with you, even subconsciously. I would love to be named one :). I too love the two long coat outfit examples you have shown. You do have a great sense of style. As someone who has always loved clothes and making outfits I do relate.
I think the term stems from the early days of blogging, before the term influencers was used, and there were tons of blogs the content of which was nothing more then daily outfit posts and monetised links.
I totally get your not wanting to be called a fashionista, for all the reasons you cite. It is a loaded term, and I think implies a single-mindedness that is certainly not part of your nature.
I adore your new bag – it’s gorgeous! What luck for you to find it at such an excellent price point – you will get so much pleasure from it.
I recently realized that I wanted a north-south tote – I was carrying a canvas tote to mahjong/book group/errands/etc., and discovered that the shape was super comfortable (I walk and/or train most places). So I sent my husband looking, with the parameters “north-south, leather, burgundy/oxblood,”and he found the perfect one, from Cambridge Satchel Company, and I am so happy with it! I wish you equal joy with yours.
You’re right, Carol, that shape and style is really easy to carry. A couple of summers ago I started carrying some of my canvas totes bought while travelling instead of a purse and they were so comfortable. Enjoy your new bag.
I’ve never thought of you as a fashionista . There is a lot more to you than that . You are just like me – not obsessed with your appearance but you like to think you ‘ scrub up well ‘ ( that might be a Yorkshire phrase ). I like your expression ‘ the art of getting dressed ‘ because I do see it as art . Long before I could buy the clothes I wanted , I was drawing them ( remember our cut out dolls ? ) I love the bag & those trousers fit beautifully . Like you I’m introducing some brown into my wardrobe, carefully , as it doesn’t really flatter my colouring . I bought a dark brown bag before Christmas then last week I got a couple of pairs of ‘tidy’ widish denim jeans from Reiss , one coffee the other dark brown . They are giving a new twist to what I already have & yes , they are great with blues , greys & creams , even black . And a yes to under accessorising .
The beige sweater is a bit of a risk for me. Since I let my hair go white I’ve stayed away from beige. It’s not a warm beige, though. I just loved it anyway. It’s so soft. How much easier it was to dress Barbies and paper dolls, eh? Their bodies and hair colour never changed. Ha.
I actually came across your blog many years ago because you were posting about your fashion choices. It felt so authentic, and thoughtful and I totally related to so much of what you wrote about.
Yep, I find the word fashionista does seem to conjure up a lot of the connotations that would make me bristle hearing it too. I do have friends that seem rather proud to boast about how they don’t really care much about clothing or fashion and its these sorts of comments that often make me feel like my interest in clothing and fashion is something to be scorned at.
Now, I’m no trend setter, thats for sure, but I do love the creativity involved in looking nicely put together. Fashionista or whatever, with the world in its current chaotic state, I’ll take my little pleasures and happily enjoy them where I can.
That’s how I see myself, too, DeeDee. I’m not a trendsetter, and if I adopt trends I’m always late to do so. And with all the world in an uproar, or that’s how it seems at times, my closet is a safe and enjoyable place to play for a bit. Ha.
Sue, I totally get how you feel. You’re a woman of much more than clothes, so to be pegged that- I can get how it bothered you. I feel the same way and yet do love clothes so much. We are much more complex than that though.
I always love the pieces you find! The skirt and jacket combo is chic ! I shy from wearing skirts in the winter because I hate being cold. If you can do it up there, I am sure I can too. The bag was a wonderful find. It’s gorgeous. Thanks for the midwinter inspiration. I’m about over all my clothes about now!
Have a good week ! x Kim
I wore that faux leather skirt while shopping in Montreal, with my ski underwear bottoms. Ha.
P.S. Kim. I wanted to add that I really applaud and admire your “Loud Daughters” account on IG. x
I’m with you about “fashionista,” especially when it’s used to sell fast fashion and make-up everywhere from Amazon to Wal-Mart. It may not have started out that way, but it implies thoughtless consumption and childishness, to me now.
The outfit on the right is so rich, that dark chocolate… what an inspiration. I hope your bag carries you many wonderful places, it’s a beauty. Great find!
To me it’s such a flippant and silly term. And yes, implies thoughtless consumption.
To me you are a woman who enjoys reading, walking, traveling, skiing and canoeing. You are a wife, a daughter, a sister, a friend and a teacher. You are someone who enjoys clothes, shopping, planning and organizing – someone who enjoys a cup of tea by the fire and a glass of wine with supper.
I only commented once on your blog. It was at the beginning of COVID when my husband died after a very brief illness. I thanked you for writing about ‘gentle reads’ because that was all I could handle at the time. Your response- your simple expression of condolences- told me you were someone who genuinely cared about people
Are you also a fashionista? I don’t really know. What I do know is that if I were to introduce you I would simply say: This is my friend Sue.
Thank you so much, Victoria. What a lovely comment. I hope you are well and navigating this new chapter in your life as best you can. xo
Sue I agree with all the previous posters. You are so much to so many! A true inspiration for many reasons. A “ fashionista “ maybe, definitely a “ thoughtful dresser”. You have made me think long and hard about what new purchases I bring into my world and have encouraged me to use items I already own. Clean classics and use of accessories allow one to present oneself with confidence. I look forward to my Sunday reads as you write beautifully.Thanks!
Thanks so much for the kind words, Barb. 🙂
How about Style Maven? Seems to fit….
I’ll take that. 🙂
I think dressing interestingly and thoughtfully is a gift to the world. We were given the ability to see and appreciate beauty in all its forms. I know that not everyone has the time or energy to think about how they dress – for some it’s all they can do is to get out the door and that’s okay. But it lifts my spirits to see a lovely color or silhouette on someone and I do think that’s a gift they have given me.
I feel the same, Karen. When I see someone who is well put together and whose style I admire it always makes me smile.
It’s so interesting how one word can be imbued with so much meaning, either positive or negative depending who is hearing it.
I’m 75 now and long retired, but for 30 years I had my own business designing and making custom clothing for women. It’s the epitome of “slow fashion”!
After years of professional couture training, including textiles, design, pattern drafting, fitting and yes, lots and lots of sewing, I had some notable successes, and many clients that I loved working with. I didn’t call myself a designer, it always seems a bit vague, and today, almost anyone can call themselves a fashion designer. I referred to myself as a custom clothier. The one word that I found cringeworthy was being referred to as a “seamstress”. There’s no shame in being a seamstress, but somehow I always felt it was a limiting and belittling descriptor, as it didn’t remotely capture the actual training and experience and expertise I had in the work I did. Like you, I prefer just being introduced by name, but people are always curious about what we do for work, and work is such a huge part of life and how we see ourselves. Now that I’m retired, I enjoy reading blogs by fashion, travel and life chroniclers, journalists, and educators, like yourself. At a certain age, hardly anyone asks anymore “what do you do?”.
I can see that the term seamstress would certainly diminish the complexity and creativity of what you did, Mira! That would make me a little steamed too. 🙂
“The art of dressing”- just, yes. What a totally complete statement. Would you share which style of Mother jeans you are wearing? Thanks ~
The Mother jeans I bought are straight-leg, and the style is “the kick it.”
I have them too- maybe that’s why I like the way they look on you so much. I am 5’4”, much shorter than you, but they make my legs look longer too! Thanks
I do believe I would take it as a nice compliment to be called a fashionista. To me it says that the person has a great sense of style and stays fashionable. Nothing negative in it for me. I love clothes and hope it shows but at the same time I don’t like excess and waste so classics it is for me with some very thoughtful trendy items mixed in here and there. I think you are the same way. I admire that!!
Thanks, Anne.
Fashionista is one of those terms that can be a positive or negative comment depending on how it’s used or applied. We’re all so much more than a single word.
I do think a lot of women over a certain age lose interest in their appearance, fashion and how they present themselves. So for me at 77, I enjoy fashion and care about my appearance so if anyone wants to call me a fashionista I’ll take it as a compliment.
Paula, I feel exactly the same at 81. Thank you for that.
I too agree. I would not mind being called a “fashionista” at all! It just means to me that I care about how I look and put thought into putting my outfits together. If someone notices how nice I look in a particular outfit and wants to tell me that by calling me a “fashionista” I am all for it! P.S. I am also 77!
I admit to being defensive about my interest in fashion. 🙂
I agree with your distaste for the term “fashionista.” But worse than being called a fashionista, I think, is calling oneself a fashionista. Perhaps, though, I just don’t like the style of the women who call themselves fashionistas.
Oh gad… that is too cringe worthy!
I really enjoyed this reflection about the “weight” of words and the thoughtful responses from your readers Sue! And that tote bag!!! It’s so gorgeous!!! Wowza. Hope I see it irl soon!
Thanks Nancy. I will plan my outfit accordingly the next time we see each other. 🙂
I agree with not viewing the term “fashionista” favorably. It seems to encourage over consumption and following trends. I just finished reading “The Look” by Michelle Obama and found her perspective interesting- Mary Lou
I’ve not heard of that book. I’ll have to look for it. I admire Michelle Obama too.
I certainly understand your response when you were labeled as a fashionista at your book club, although I am sure it was intended to be a compliment. In my mind, that term implies a shallowness, which is not how you or any thoughtful person would want to be considered when first meeting someone. I had a similar experience at a previous book club, where one member said that “I was too elegant for them”; knowing the person, I think she meant it as a compliment, but it felt like a slight.
Like you, I enjoy clothes and try to dress well, but I am not obsessed with fashion; rather, I want to look good but am also conscious of cost and comfort. I simply want to express myself and feel confident in my appearance without obsessing about my image.
I feel that your love of fashion strikes the right balance between enjoying it but doing so while being considerate of its many costs; to your pocketbook, to the environment, and to our society (which judges women on how they look, rightly or wrongly). Besides the fun aspect of fashion, I believe that making the effort to present ourselves well shows that we value ourselves, and that is a very admiral trait.
Oh, yes…. the you’re too dressed up for us comment. I’ve had those even though I was wearing jeans.
I have been called a fashionista many times and have taken it as a compliment. I have never thought it had a negative connotation until now! I really think it is complimentary and implies you take time and care over your appearance, staying current and well groomed. I think most people take it that way.💕
I agree that it implies one takes care over their appearance. But beyond that we have to agree to disagree, Sandy. 🙂
I may be a late bloomer, but I was introduced to the word fashionista when I found the books by Ari Seth Cohen and the people he interviews and photographs. Women mostly and a few men, mostly older, who dress eloquently and are confident, and who might dare to be different because they love well made clothing and colour.
Some are a bit overdone for my personal taste but most are just happy and loving life.
So if that is a fashionista, I am IN.
My humble opinion.
Ari Seth Cohen’s subjects definitely show exuberance and a love of life that is contagious.
I don’t know your friend who introduced you to the book club as a fashionista but I am feeling kind of sorry for her. I think you over did it.
Oh, I agree with you. This friend must have been shocked.
I felt bad after I said it. I shocked myself with my vehemence.
I have a similar response to the term “fashionista”. Somehow to me it feels like a shallow term, used to suggest a woman who is wedded to the frivolous and incapable of serious thinking.I reckon I might hear it as a slight, I hope your friend didn’t mean it that way.
I don’t know about you lot but I don’t think I’ve ever heard this term used to describe a man. Funny that huh? I see someone above has seen the term used to describe (a few) men. Not something I’ve ever noticed.
Sue, I was interested in your writing about collecting photos of the lovely Max Mara clothes. You said it didn’t make you run off to buy them and I have used a similar process to curb my buying. What I do is to think that when I see something startlingly gorgeous I remind myself that it’s like seeing a lovely piece of art in a gallery. Beautifully curated and very seductive but I can’t buy all the art I fall in love with so I take a photo and just try and appreciate the beauty. I’ve started doing that with clothes that catch my eye. I can be inspired and I don’t have to own it/them.
A work for me in progress but it is having an impact.
I know my friend meant it as a compliment. I just don’t like being introduced that way to someone who knows nothing else about me.
I have a folder on my computer where I save photos that inspire me. I peruse it if I need some inspiration. Or just want to look at lovely shots. 🙂
As someone who feels she never mastered the art of dressing, and often resorts to “boring” just to be safe while longing for more style and confidence, I would have loved to be called “fashionista” lol.
The word can mean many things to many people, it seems. 🙂
Hmm, fashionista…nah, I’d say more of a wardrobe analyst. AI thoughtfully provided me with this description of an analyst:
“An analyst collects, examines, and interprets complex data, information, or materials to identify trends, patterns, and areas for improvement. They transform this information into actionable insights to assist in making informed and strategic decisions.”
Sounds like a more accurate description of your wardrobe “columns” which is why I choose to read your thoughts instead of the prattle (always loved that word!) of other fashionista types.
Wardrobe analyst… I’ll take that. 🙂
P.S. I love the word prattle too.
I have a hunch that the woman who called you a fashionista thought of that descriptor as a blanket term for someone who, in her mind and probably unlike herself, always looks fashionably put together. Yes, I think she meant it as a compliment, but I can understand your bristling at it because it may make you sound one-dimensional, which one would never want to convey in a group intro.
I get that because although I’ve never been called “fashionista,” I’ve often had people call attention to how well “accessorized” or “put together” I am. Sometimes it is meant as a compliment and sometimes it seems as if they’re belittling me that I’m “overly” concerned about my appearance. I think the latter comes from their own insecurities. (It’s not unlike the dinner guest who seems to take offense that your tablescape is so fabulous.)
Like you, I just love putting clothes and accessories together to try to look my best. It’s one of the things that *I* do for fun. Simple as that.
Maybe next time someone calls me a fashionista I will ask them to define what they mean. They might be surprised at how I interpret it.
There is a difference between looking and feeling good and caring about that above all else. I would think all of us here while interested in looking good, also care deeply about many other issues. That’s why we keep coming together 😊 no shame in looking like you care to present yourself well, and I too see it as my gift to others. God knows we all need a bit of beauty now.
We definitely do, Cathie.
Better to be “fashionista” than “a fashion victim”:)
Just joking-you are such a multifaceted person,with so many interest and talents. Style is a kind of art in my book
Your friend (hopefully) has meant it as compliment (“Fashionista At the Book Club”-such a good title,don’t you think?) ,but I could relate to your reaction
I didn’t forget a comment from some of my “friends” behind my back (heard via the grapevine)- ” she -I !- likes brands”,it sounded like “she’s so superficial and shallow”,it was little less than 50 years ago, during communism (so,I was even more superficial and shallow :)),and it was not meant as a compliment. Only brands we could afford or buy than were Levi’s,Rayban,Lacoste and similar.
To quote Mel Robbins : Let them!
Such a beautiful bag!
Dottoressa
Ha. Oh yes. When I was shopping in Montreal I saw several women who I would call fashionista… or even fashion victim.
As to the brands comment, a reader once commented that she didn’t think I could get dressed if the pieces weren’t brand names. I thought to myself, every piece of clothing has a brand. I think the reader was disappointed that the post was, as she said, “another fashion post!”
Sue,
I love your style, perhaps because it’s very similar to mine. I equally admire your taste in literature. I’ve been in two different book clubs during the past 20 years, and based on your recommendation, we’ve both read and loved Hotel du Lac by Anita Brookner. You are no mere “fashionista”!
Please keep up the good work. Your blog inspires me to dress better, and is a pleasure to read.
Thanks so much, Catherine. I’m pleased that you loved Hotel du Lac. I suggested it to a book club years ago and people were quite dismissive about it.
Hmmm…maybe it’s answering the question: Does dressing up and looking good give you more joy when you look in the mirror than when you imagine other people looking admiringly at you? In other words, who do you dress for? If it’s primarily for others – I think that leans towards being a fashionista – but if it’s for you, that seems like a lover of fashion! 👗
I’d say it’s for myself, Pat.
No one has ever called me a fashionista and I doubt they would, so I can’t quite know how I’d react. That said, I have a colleague who loves clothes. A few months ago she saw me in the office and said, “Thank you!” and then waved her hand up and down indicating my outfit. “It’s a pleasure seeing your outfits every day.” (I tend to dress like a middle aged Italian man, with a touch of femininity :), very gamine, so I did think it was a funny remark. My colleague is very classically feminine in her style. I did understand what she meant.) I suspect your friend meant something similar, but didn’t have the language for it, but of course I don’t know the situation.
Maybe you just live in the wrong culture. Honestly, I don’t know anyone here who shops at high end shops, other than one of my grandmothers back in the day, who always dressed at the top of her game. On the flip side, all of my Italian connections (partner and family and friends) speak the language of fashion fluently and it is considered as natural as brushing your hair and your teeth to care about how your outfits fit together and the quality of the pieces, including those from known brands. My partner just sent me photos from his walk the other night because he saw two jackets on sale in a window that he thought I would love and he asked me if he could buy me one (the saldi are still on there). Neither of us buys very much, but we always buy quality and enjoy putting our clothes together. When he puts on an outfit his pants are creased, he thinks about how the colours blend, and he often looks more put together than me! (Naturally, he would say. :))
I love that comment from your co-worker, Steph. It’s nice that people can appreciate style other than what they themselves would wear. My old friend Jeannie, who passed away last year, was the main person whom I talked to about fashion. Except my sister… and the women who work at Bellwether’s Vintage. Those girls love to chat about clothes. Shopping there is as much a visit with friends as it is a shopping foray.
I was so sad for you when you wrote that tender piece about Jeannie.
My colleague and I couldn’t be more opposite (her style is more British princess and mine more English stablehand crossed with Italian rake :)). I agree though that there’s a recognition between people who care about style.
I have to admit that I am not fond of words that pigeon hole people and can quite understand your dislike of the term used to describe you. Your friend probably meant no disrespect but the word fashionista does make you sound one dimensional when we all know you are not. I’ve read your blog for several years now and while fashion and style does get discussed it is all the other aspects that have kept me reading. Books, travel, family and thoughts on life are so well written and interesting. Perhaps treat it as a “sticks and stones” moment.
Thanks, Kenzie. 🙂
How about “thoughtfully stylish?”
That’s how I think of you:)
I’ll take that, my friend. 🙂
Style: K.d lang, Diane Keaton, Whoopi Goldberg, Mary Simon, Eileen Fisher, Melanie Jolie, Diana Fox Carney, Adrian Arsenault, Queen Elizabeth, Queen Camilla, Elizabeth Warren, Caroline Kennedy etc. Women who know themselves and what suits them. All different but true to self.
Fashionistas: Melania Trump, Lady Gaga, Princess Diana, Barbra Streisand, Victoria Beckham: those who present a characters in a performance.
Both are aspirational. One is contrived one is real.
Good call, Mary Lou. Although I do love Lady Gaga. Her outfits are unashamedly costumes.
Well written. I don’t understand people. I too love clothes , always have always will and I care about what I put on when I leave the house. I get referred to as a “shopper” which always seems like a negative label.. I have many other qualities that others know about and yet “ shopper” is the one that people bring up. The reason I don’t like it is that it is one note, like I have no other skills or abilities. I try to not let it bother me, but I know that it does. I often remind myself that it is often said by people who care less about their appearance. Anyway another great post!
Thanks, Bonita. I can understand that being called a “shopper” would be a bit galling.
“Fashionista” is a very loaded term for me with all sorts of connotations that I don’t particularly like. Fashionistas wear the latest trends and try to direct women’s spending in specific ways. You’re not like that all. Yes, you like clothes but not in a latest trends kind of way. You’re much more considered than that and are more interested in what looks and feels good to you than showing off the latest trends. Having said that, perhaps fashion has become a more frequent topic on your blog than it once was, or that might be my faulty memory.
I think that about 50% of my posts are about fashion, maybe a bit less. When I started the blog, I wrote twice a week. One post was always a fashion post and the other was about books or travel or something else. Unless we were on a trip then it was all travel.
Esteemed commentators, I’m 75 and I believe that I have earned the right to put whatever interpretation/slant on a word that I want. I’m a fashionista. I love the idea of fashion. It was my armour behind which I hid. Yes I was excruciatingly insecure and given my spending mistakes, I still am and I still have much to learn. However what a learning curve! Let’s just support each other. Let’s put whatever interpretation on words that we want and above all, let’s wear what we have and /or buy with pride
You have definitely earned the right to interpret the word however you like, Krystyna. 🙂
On reading all the comments I must say this has turned out to be a very interesting discussion . I wonder if the word fashionista has different meanings depending where you are in the world . Here in semi rural North Yorkshire it never crops up in conversation . The times I am most aware of it is in trashy newspapers discussing the Beckhams etc & nobody I know would want that label . Perhaps it’s considered a compliment elsewhere ? The joys of language . You’ve certainly got us thinking .
The word certainly generated a lot of discussion, Wendy!
Oh I could have written EVERY word here myself. I get that type of comment a lot – at work, between friends, etc, and I really, really dislike it. Like you mentioned, it smacks of airheadedness and a focus on things that don’t matter. I dress for myself, not for the gaze of anyone else.
That’s good to know, Lisa. 🙂
I don’t think that I’ve ever used the word fashionista. I can relate to being a little sensitive about liking clothes and being interested in fashion. There are people who react to someone who admits it. There are people who will react to almost anything. I was at a gathering once and one woman said to another something about, but it’s pink and we don’t do pink. Made me like pink just a little more. There are those who are a bit disdainful about women liking pink. It’s not my favorite color, but I am not going to give it up because of the attitude that women shouldn’t like it.
You seem to have a healthy approach to enjoying fashion and clothing. Colors and textures, shapes and drapes. Very artistic in a way.
You look great in clothes and I’m glad that you enjoy writing about them, just as I enjoy reading your posts about books, traveling, friendship, family or ski trips. You are clearly a well-rounded person and a smart person.
Thanks so much, Dottie. 🙂
Having read all the comments, I would rather be called stylish than the other F word. That’s what I’ve been called, stylish. I know that’s a compliment. That to me is the quirky way that I put things together. Just that bit different. When strangers comment, you know it works. My husband is alway amazed!
I love your clothes, but they would not work for me. I’m petite, and just a tad edgy, even though I’m a bit older than you.
I’m so jealous of your height…
The “F” word… I love that. 🙂
At least you weren’t described as a “fashion girlie!” Girlie! Why do so many young influencers use that derogatory term?
Oh gad, I hate that. Even older content creators call themselves girlies.
Sue, I really enjoyed your post. I would have bristled by the description as well but I’m also sure that any friend of yours would have intended the description to be a compliment.
A wonderful collection of responses from the community you’ve built!
I love the many topics you explore in your blog.
Lots of great comments aren’t there?
Hi Sue
I enjoy very much reading your blogs especially the travel ones. Trust me, you have taken me to many places beyond my belief! This article was excellent and the inputs from various readers shows the impact of style and how we make it our own. Hope all is well!! Best Wishes for 2026. Sharon
Hey there old friend. Best wishes to you too for a wonderful 2026. Thanks for reading my blog… and for commenting.
These days I am definitely more Team Comfort than Team Style !
Hi Sue
Wonderful post…I don’t read your posts nearly as often as I would like, but I completely understand where you are coming from. I hate the word influencer too, but I have finally made peace with it…sort of….
Thanks, Cindy. I would say that you are an influencer who uses her powers for good… so to speak. 🙂
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